Ever After: Fathers and the Impact of Adoption is the first book in the world to integrate one father's personal experience with more general accounts of how men have reacted to losing a child to adoption. It is an account of the impact of adoption on birth fathers and the influence of birth fathers on adoption. This is what readers have said about Ever After: Fathers and the Impact of Adoption:
· “At last a book about birth fathers written by a birth father!” Nancy Verrier, author of The Primal Wound and adoptive parent
· “Highly recommended to all affected by adoption, no matter where you ‘sit’ in the triad, I promise you will be touched and enriched by this superbly written book.” Julia Cantrell, editor and adopted person
· “Gary Coles’ book wears his heart on its sleeve … Coles’ account is both one of an inward and outward journey.” Gary Clapton, academic and birth father
· “This book … dispels the myth that all fathers who lose children to adoption don’t care about their partners or their children.” Sandra Falconer Pace, author and birth mother
About the Author
Gary Coles is a birth father. His first-born son was raised in New Zealand by adoptive parents.
He graduated with BSc Honours, majoring in geology, from Victoria University of Wellington. He has spent most of his adult life living and working in Australia.
Gary began exploring his adoption experience in 1992. He made his first presentation to an adoption conference in 1998, coincidentally in the city where his adopted son lives. Since then he has written extensively about adoption, particularly bringing the viewpoint of birth fathers into the discussions. He has published three books (in 2004, 2005 and 2010) and more than forty papers and articles (1998-2010), made presentations to the last three Australian Adoption Conferences (2000, 2004, 2008), presented seminars in Australia and New Zealand, and been a keynote speaker on three occasions for Concerned United Birthparents in the USA.
Gary’s present position is Manager of VANISH Inc, the Victorian post-adoption services and support organisation. Previously, he had been a VANISH service user and then he served as an office-bearer on the organisation’s Committee of Management. In his present role, he oversees the provision of practical and emotional assistance to those who seek the other members of their birth families. He also educates the public and the helping professions about the impact of adoption.